Searching for a new job

Hey Guys!

So since moving to North Dakota, I had to give up my old job that I had working for our local County back home because they would not let me go remote unfortunately and it was also just becoming a toxic work environment for me and I needed to say goodbye anyways. But it has been about 3 months now and I still haven't really gotten many hits. I haven't had a single interview either. I have had a couple companies reach out to schedule one and after reviewing the job posting, the company on Glassdoor or just emailing with person who reached out to me I didn't end up taking the interview for various reasons.

What it’s Like to be an Extreme Planner with Anxiety

So one thing that I do is plan. Like a lot! I like to plan pretty much everything. I like to plan my day out, I like to plan my week out, and sometimes even a year or two in advanced. I also have anxiety. I've never been on medication or anything for my anxiety. It's a personal choice. I'd rather figure out how to deal with it on my own. I've been to therapy once for it and it also wasn't really my thing. I've had anxiety since I was a child but I'll probably talk more about that in a different post. I'm currently struggling with having anxiety because I plan too much but then when I'm not planning anything, I get anxiety. So I'm currently stuck in an endless cycle and I'm trying to figure out how to get out of it.

It’s kind of ironic that I'm such a huge planner because I actually hate using planners. I buy one typically every year but I never use it. My thing is to have a lined notebook where I can write down things in a more detailed manner. When I was in college I would literally schedule every hour of my day. I would wake up at 7, eat breakfast, sit down at my desk and write down my plans for the day so I could cross them off as I went along. I didn’t always follow my plans exactly, sometimes I would switch things around or the timing wouldn’t work out or something else so I would scratch that list and create a new one with the remaining hours left in the day. Now that I’m working it’s kind of hard to do that because I can’t really do that with my work since I basically just work off of a bunch of random task lists and I can't schedule them out. I mean I can but I can't really because some of them only take like 5 minutes to work on and some of them take like 2 hours to work on, it just depends on how much there is on each task list. So I do really miss that kind of structure and I definitely think that it would help with my anxiety but at the same time it might make it worse. 

So what I mean by extreme planner, is that currently when I plan something out that’s for my future I take into consideration my future kids that don’t even exist yet and probably won’t exist for a while. I think of basically everything and when I feel like it’s not really going to work out the way I want it to, I tend to get really bad anxiety! Sometimes I even plan out to the very tiniest detail and again if something doesn’t work out then I get really bad anxiety or I tend to get upset. I’ve pretty much been this way my whole life, which is another reason why I chose not to participate in a lot of activities growing up. I think even as a kid I knew things weren’t going to go how I wanted/planned them to go so I would just opt out and say no thank you! For me it’s easier to say no and walk away from a situation than to let myself be let down. There’s nothing I hate more than being disappointed, especially when it comes to myself. 

As hard as some of the classes were that I took in school, school was always easy for me because it was a routine. All I had to do was go to class, study the material and then pass the class. I didn’t always get an A but for a lot of my classes I didn’t really care. As long as if I got a B I would be good because deep down I knew the material didn’t really matter for real life, especially for high school. For college, I’ve used a few things that I learned but not much really! I think you don’t really start to learn the material for real life until you get into a masters program. That's when you're really able to dive in deep and learn more in-depth stuff.

The other reason I don’t plan out my day as much now that I’m a working adult is because when I get home from work, which is usually right before 5, all I want to do is sit on the couch and relax. I don’t want to get up and do work around the house. I’ve been at work for 9 hours and haven't been home in almost 10 hours because of my driving and I just want to relax! I want to be lazy! The only time I really ever do anything is on Friday nights and on the weekends. I mean I usually do stuff during the week but it’s a struggle to get up and get the motivation to actually do them. Like for example, writing this blog! I love writing my blog and I love coming up with new ideas and topics to talk about but I seriously lack the motivation to actually sit down and write it. I lack the energy to think about what I’m going to say. I’ve been using my brain constantly all day and all I want to do is not think! I try to catch up with things on the weekend but sometimes I’m so busy playing catch up that it’s hard to get things done that I actually want to get done!

And since I’m such a huge planner when I was younger I pretty much planned out my whole life, boyfriend by like 22 or 23, married with my masters by 25, and having kids and possibly my doctorate by 30! So far I’ve only accomplished 1 of those things! And I’m about to turn 26! So currently I’ve been feeling a little disappointed in myself for not following through on my plans. Granted some of them aren’t really up to me but other ones were. To be honest, life isn't really up to any of us. You can make a choice but it doesn't really mean that it's going to turn out the way you want it to. Your story is written by God and only he knows what will happen in your life.

I’m working really hard on telling myself everyday to just let life happen and enjoy every moment but I honestly think it’s going to take a really long time for me to stop feeling the way I do about planning out life. I've also been working on trying to catch myself when my brain goes off the deep end and starts thinking and planning things out. I have to tell myself to stop, to relax, and think about something else. I try to think about what I'm currently working on and sometimes I'll think of something to talk to my coworkers about so I can get my mind off of things. They all know that I'm huge planner, they tell me all the time so they probably have figured out that's why I talk so much at work haha!

I'm basically stuck because planning my life gives me anxiety but not planning my life gives me anxiety. I wish there was a happy medium between the two but so far I haven't been able to find it. I also wish I could care a little less about the future but I just want to make sure that I'm living life to it's fullest potential and that I take advantage of every opportunity. I feel like if you don't plan then you will miss out on a lot of things or you'll end up regretting how something turned out. I hope some people can relate to this post and if not I hope it didn't depress anyone haha!

Thanks for stopping by!

XO, Steph

Life Lessons with Steph

Hey guys,

This post is going to be super short! For real this time! I randomly just came up with this idea and I like trying new things so we're going to try something new! I'm randomly going to write posts about life (covering pretty much any subject I think of) and things I've learned over the last 25 years. I have a few ideas already in my head for things I want to write about and I realized that they all kind of just have to deal with life and things I'm going through, things I'm working on, or things I've already gone through and have learned from them.

Some of the topics might be kind of harsh but I've always been a very truthful person and I usually tell it how it is. It's basically what I'm known for in my family. If I don't like something I'm not afraid to say it even if it might hurt someone, which yes I realize isn't really the greatest thing but it's how I've been since I was like 4 or 5. My mom always jokes that I used to run the household because if the family wanted to do something but I didn't then we didn't do it! And if we did, I usually would throw a temper tantrum. Granted I really hope my kid does not turn out this way because hearing the stories I feel awful for my mom and how I acted but sometimes you can only help a kid so much haha. 

Anyways, one of the topics I'm going to talk about first is about change. This is something has really had a big impact on me lately, especially in a couple different areas of my life. It's also been causing a lot of stress for me and I feel like if I just write about it, it might help relieve some of that stress. I might also be able to figure out a solution to the recent changes that have happened or how at least how to come to terms with everything! Some other topics include, how I deal with depression, friendships, and faith.

There isn't going to be a schedule with these posts, I'm just going to randomly write them and post them when I feel comfortable and when I feel they are ready to be seen by people. Some of them I might write and never post but like I said just writing things down might be feel better. I hope that this works and I hope that you guys enjoy reading them! 

Talk to you soon!

XO, Steph

How to Make Work Days Seem Shorter

Hey guys,

Okay so now that I work a normal 40 hour work week job, this is such a huge thing for me. I am always trying to figure out new ways to make time go by faster. Yes, I love my job but obviously everyone would rather be back at home doing stuff that they need to get done around the house or spending time with their loved ones or even going out and doing the things they enjoy most.

My number 1 tip is to make sure you avoid looking at the clock as much as possible. My job is a computer job so I am always looking at a screen and my eyes always wander down to the clock. I try to avoid looking at it but I can admit it, it's very challenging. However, I have noticed that when I am focused on my work and don't look at the clock that time goes by so much faster. But I do have to admit that this only happens on some days. For example, Wednesday's and Friday's, time basically does not move and I feel like I am going to be stuck at work forever. The fastest days for me are definitely Tuesday's and Thursday's, these two days just fly by for me and it is absolutely wonderful. 

My next advice is to make sure that you are keeping yourself busy as much as possible. If you work off of a task list then just stay focused and get your stuff done. With that being said, make sure you aren't working too fast though because you don't want to finish with your tasks and there still be 3 hours left at work with nothing else for you to do. You also want to make sure that you are taking your time and not making any mistakes. Another way I keep myself busy is by interacting with my coworkers. We don't really have any rules that says we can't talk during our shifts and sometimes our supervisor will come over to us and tell us about her personal life for like 20 minutes. So if your work allows you to be social with one another then make sure you are engaging in conversations but also make sure you are still doing work. It's okay to turn around and talk to each other for a few minutes but you don't want to make it seem like you aren't working. You are getting paid to work not to talk!

Another tip is if your work allows two 15 minute break then you could definitely take them. They will go by fast but if you think about it, then that's 30 minutes total a day that you are doing something you enjoy doing or taking a break from doing something you might not love doing. I personally don't do this because I usually never know what to do during these breaks but there are quite a few people I work with that make sure they take their 15 minute breaks. 

I also recommend that you find a little joy in whatever it is that you do for a living. If you absolutely hate your job then your days are going to drag on! They will seem like they are never ending and you're just going to keep hating your job. Also, if you really hate your job then I highly recommend that you either talk to a supervisor and discuss this with them and see if you can come up with some kind of solution or if they have any advice. Most companies force their supervisors to have an open door policy so technically you are allowed to speak freely with them about whatever you want. If you guys can't come up with a solution then it might be time to start looking for another job. 

I hope you guys enjoyed this post and happy Monday! May your day just fly by so you can get back home to your family!

Talk to you soon!

XO, Steph

25 Things To Do Before I Turn 25 Final Update

Hey guys,

So I know I turned 25 like 4 months ago but I’ve been a little lazy and a little busy! But here it is, my updated and final 25 things to do before I turn 25 list! I have to admit that I definitely failed at this list which makes me a little disappointed in myself but at the same time I did so many wonderful things before I turned 25 and honestly I look back and can't believe that I have been able to do some of them. 

So my update is that I actually didn’t check anything new off of this list from the last update, which is why I am not going to say much. I did however make it to Germany but it was not before I turned 25. It was about a month after I turned 25 so I was a little late but at least I got to go! 

1) Travel to Italy

2) Travel to Germany

3) Travel to Greece

4) Own a House

5) Live somewhere new out of Florida (even if only for a short amount of time)
6) Get started on my Masters
7) Buy a new car

8) Completely decorate a place with new furniture and have it paid off
9) Improve my French or learn the basics of a new language
10) Watch all of the Star Wars Movies
11) Make some blogging friends and maybe experience new things because of blogging
12) Help my sister publish her book and then maybe read it (haha)
13) Go on a road trip
14) Go to a professional hockey game
15) Go to a professional bull riding event
16) Go on a Mission Trip
17) Volunteer at a Summer Camp
18) Buy a Chanel Bag
19) Do something that scares me
20)Travel to Colorado with my sister
21) Go Zip Lining
22) Go tubing/white water rafting
23) Help build a house for Habitat for Humanity
24) Pay it forward
25) Either be dating, engaged or married

My next blog post will be “30 Things to do Before I Turn 30” and basically everything that I did not check off will be added to that list but some will be removed because I either don’t think I will ever be doing them or I no longer have an interest in doing them anymore.

Talk to you soon!

XO, Steph

Job Hunting 2018

Hey guys,

So I'm currently in New York right now, I flew in last night after my mom and sister got off from work! We are here until Monday August 6th and we fly back that afternoon! I absolutely love this city and I am so glad that for the last 4 years or so we have been able to take a girls trip up to the city to visit, check out new things and of course, shop! This is one of my favorite places to be! I plan to do a whole travel diary about the trip for each day that we are here so keep an eye out for that, granted I'm not entirely sure when it will be up! Anyways today's post is kind of a rant but hopefully like an inspirational one! I'm going be talking all about job hunting and finding a new job! 

I originally wanted to start off this series with this post but the other two were just so much easier to write that I was able to finish them first! I kind of have a lot to say about this topic since I've been job hunting for about 3 months now and the last time I job hunted, it took me about 3 months or so before I found a job as well. I also plan on giving you guys some more details about my back story and why job hunting can be a little challenging for me!

Honestly, finding a new job is very challenging and can be very discouraging! My number one tip is that you don't give up because it will happen, eventually! Two quotes that I would constantly tell myself were good things come to those who wait and everything happens for a reason! I honestly, am not looking forward to the next time I have to search for a new job but hopefully it won't be for the next couple years or hopefully I will be able to just get promoted from within if I really like my job.

To start off with, I'm going to say that everyone is different. You might find a job in a week or it might take you like 3+ months. I've been hunting since about May and I have applied to probably almost 50+ jobs in the 3 month period and I have gotten a lot of interview requests but after some more thought and consideration I choose not to go to a lot of them. I mostly applied to just get my name out there because you never know, you might apply for one job and then the company has a different spot that might work better for you. Honestly, when it comes to job hunting you really don't know what's going to happen. You might start the process thinking that you want to work in one field but once you start applying and interviewing you might end up in a completely different field.

Also, some of them I applied to thinking I might work a second job until I was able to find a full time position. Granted once I actually thought that through, I thought it was a bad idea because then I wouldn't really have that much time to actually find a job because I would probably be working almost 40 hours a week between the two jobs with completely random hours and a different schedule every week making it hard to schedule interviews. So I decided to keep my one job and switch my hours to closing shifts only so that way I would be able to scheduled as many interviews as necessary.

When I started this process back in 2016 when I first graduated college I knew that it would be hard. I like to try and prove people wrong and I like to try and overcome challenges, it's how I've always been. If someone tells me I can't do something then guess what I try and do it, and most of the time I can. I knew that when I chose not to work in college, I knew that I would have a really hard time finding a job when I graduated and people told me all the time that I should get a job because I needed the experience but apart of me didn't really want to because I had more than enough money to survive thanks to the my dad and the GI Bill and I wanted to be able to spend the rest of my youth not working because I knew that when I graduated college I would have to spend the next 30+ years of my life working hard to create a future for my family and for myself when I do finally decide to retire. I always hear people complaining about their jobs and how much they wish they could retire already and I really didn't want to start living my life like that until I had finished college.

Do I regret not working in college? Sometimes but most of the time no because I was able to go on family vacations and I had the freedom to pretty much go wherever I wanted whenever I wanted! I didn't have to request time off from work and I was able to spend more time with my family and focus on school. I graduated with two Bachelor's Degree's in four years and aside from my sister, I don't really know anyone else that completed two Bachelor's Degrees in four years. Every time I tell people that they are so impressed and honestly, so am I. It wasn't easy, I had to take extra classes and work a little harder and I pretty much worked through every summer except my very first.

I have two bachelor's degrees that I worked really hard to earn and I am very proud to see how far I've come! Yes, I have friends that have already started their careers and are making so much more money than I am but I honestly, don't really care about that! I know that in time I will make more than enough money to support myself and my family! I also do kind of want to be a stay at home for a few years anyways soooo I'm really banking on my husband to make enough money to support our family, at least for a few years until our youngest is in either preschool or VPK!

I think that's pretty much all I have to say for right now and I hope that this inspires and educates some people! Thankfully in life, everyone gets to make their own decisions so what you want to do with your life is up to you! Do what makes you happy but make sure you're smart about it at least! 

So I just wanted to end this weeks series of finding a new job by saying that I found a full time job! It took some time but I am very excited about this new opportunity and I can't wait to learn new things with this position! The location and the hours are wonderful! I will be working about 10 minutes away from my house and working 7:30 am - 4:30 in the afternoon which will give me plenty of time to still get so much done throughout the day. I will get an hour lunch which I am so excited about because 30 minutes just isn't enough time! I will definitely have to get on a better sleep scheduled but I couldn't be more excited to finally have a routine in my life again. I also handed in my two weeks on Wednesday at DSW and my last day will be the 16th of August and I start my new job on the 30th of August! Once I actually start my new job I will probably do a full post on it giving you guys more details!

Thanks for stopping by!

XO, Steph

Interview Advice

Hey guys,

Happy August 1st! I can't believe how fast this year has just flown by! It's absolutely crazy! To be honest, the last 3 months have kind of just dragged on but gone by really quickly at the same time, it's so weird! Anyways, the reason I wanted to write this post was because I have been interviewing a lot lately and I just kind of wanted to sum up some of the things I've learned and some advice I want to share with you.

Tip #1

Always dress professional! I don't care where you are going to work or what anyone else has ever told you but don't show up to an interview in anything other than dress pants, closed toe shoes, and a blouse or button downs. You can also wear a dress or skirt to an interview just please make sure that it hits at or below the knees and that it looks professional. Basically my advice is to dress like you are going to court! You want to make sure you look nice, clean and presentable. First impressions are everything and if you aren't willing to dress nice for the position then I can guarantee the company is going to think that you aren't willing to do most of the work they plan to ask you to do!

Tip #2

It's completely okay to be nervous! These people are only human and they are not going to hurt you. Yes they have the power to give you a job or not but in the end just remember to breathe and be yourself. If you aren't being yourself they might be able to tell and they might not like that. They might also be able to tell that you're nervous and that's okay too. I promise you that most of them don't care and to honest, some of them might be nervous as well. They might hate conducting interviews as much as you hate going to them. But it's apart of life and we all need to just relax and everything will be okay! The main reason I'm bringing up this topic is because this is something that I really struggle with. My last interview I almost ran out of the building and said I couldn't do it! But thankfully I didn't! I survived and in the end I think the interview went really well. 

Tip #3

Make sure to always prepare for an interview! I don't care who you think you are, it's always best to show up prepared. They might ask you a question that you don't know the answer to but if you come up with questions and answers then you might be able to create an answer really quickly based off the questions and answers you practiced. There is nothing wrong in being prepared and I don't believe there is such a thing as being too prepared. However, I do believe in overthinking things because that's what I tend to do!

Tip #4 

Always ask questions. Honestly, I hate this part of interviews they always ask me if I have any questions and then I freeze and I'm like "ummm?? no?". But you need to ask at least 1 to 2 questions. Asking questions is a way for you to get more info out of them and it also shows them that you are actually interested in the position. If you don't want to know more about the job then to them you aren't actually interested in the job and you probably will never hear back from them. However, if this is the case and you are just using them as interview practice then I probably would not bother asking any questions if you don't really want to hear back from the company.

Tip #5
For my final tip, if you really want the job, don't forget to send out your thank you emails within 24-48 hours of the interview. I had my last interview on a Friday and so I sent them out Sunday night so they would have them in their inboxes by Monday morning. I feel like a lot of people forget this step but honestly, I think it really helps! It's very important to thank the person for taking the time to consider interviewing you and actually interviewing you. Make sure that if you are interview by more than 1 person that you send out an email to everyone person that interviewed you and that you make each one a little different. Also just write a few sentences thanking them and basically telling them why you are perfect for the job! Don't make it too long but don't just say thanks.

I hope this post helps anyone looking for a new job! I think that all of these tips have really helped me and just remember that everything happens for a reason so if there is a job you really wanted but didn't get, it's probably because there is an even better one waiting for you around the corner!

Thanks for stopping by!

XO, Steph

Top 10 Interviews Questions

Hey guys,

 So since I've been doing a lot of interviews lately I thought it would be a fun idea to write up 10 popular interview questions that I tend to focus on. One thing I've learned lately, is that when it comes to interviews and interviewing for different companies and hiring managers, you might not always get your typical interview questions. The last two interviews I went to, they didn't ask me a single question from top 20 questions that I have written down. But they asked me questions that were kind of similar.

What I like to do is make up a list of questions that people ask in interviews a lot and I type up my answers and then I review them before I have an interview. I make them pretty general that way you can mold them to fit to the specific job you are applying for. To make this list I just googled top interview questions or most popular interview questions and then a bunch of websites pull up. A lot of them will have repeat questions so once you get your list going I just go to random sites and find ones that I don't already have on my list. I am an extremely organized and detail oriented person so I like to make sure that I am very prepared for anything and everything. If I'm not then I have the tendency to get really bad anxiety. 

So below I have listed out my top 10 questions that I tend to study the most and have probably been asked the most. I also chose these 10 questions because my mom and sister conduct interviews for new hires at their work and so they have a list of popular questions that they tend to ask the people they are interviewing and these are some of the questions that they ask. 

1) Tell me about yourself.

2) What are your 5 greatest strengths?

3) What are your 5 greatest weaknesses?

4) Why should we hire you?

5) Why do you want this job?

6) How well do handle stress?

7) How well do you work with others?

8) How do you handle a difficult situation/customer at work?

9) What traits do you think (insert job title) should have?

10) Why are you looking to leave your current job?

So these are the 10 questions that I stick to and they pretty much help me answer whatever question comes my way. Most interviewers will be using questions that are based off of these questions they just change the wording some to fit the job description a little better. 

When it comes to the greatest strengths and weaknesses, they might not always ask for a certain number but it's good to have at least 5 prepared just incase! I know that 5 seems like a large of things to come up with but I promise you there are 5 things that you are great at and 5 things that you stink at that you can figure out how to turn into a positive thing! There's not such thing as perfection which is my number 1 biggest weakness! 

Also, I know that "why should we hire you" and "why do you want this job" seem like very similar questions but they aren't! The "why do you want this job" question is basically asking you why you really want this job or are you just applying to apply. The why should we hire you is your chance to tell them how you are so much better than the other people that have applied for the job.

Remember to always be honest, don't lie in an interview because if you do it will come out someday that you did and then it won't make you look very good. You also could potentially be fired for lying, it all just depends on the company and how they want to handle the situation.

I hope this helps everyone! I know that finding a new job can be stressful which is why I decided to write up these posts! I thoroughly enjoy helping people so I really hope that this helps at least one person! 

Thanks for stopping by!

XO, Steph